Now that you have met some of my friends (the ones I'm going to talk about mostly), it is time for you to meet my boyfriend.
This is Cameron. He's my boyfriend. He looks like a jerk because he never smiles, but he's probably the nicest person on this half of the world. (Ghandi and Mother Theresa would most likely beat him in this department.) Anyways, I didn't always think he was the nicest person ever. Actually, I thought he was an ass and a racist bastard. We met at Taylor's Fourth of July pool and fireworks party. We knew each other from high school, but we had never really talked before. Anyways, so there he was standing in Taylor's livingroom and I'm trying to make eye contact with him, but it's just not working. Every time I go to look at him he looks away, so I decide to approach him. I toss the last guy I was hanging on aside and walked up to him...
Usually when I'm flirting with guys they're kind enough to flirt back even if there isn't any interest there. It's just a widely believed fact that playing along is more fun. But with Cameron, all of the flirting was one way. So I'm standing there basically throwing myself at him and he's trying his hardest to ignore me. This was making me mad because NO ONE ignores me. I ALWAYS get my way. It's just how my extremely manipulative personality works. Anyway, since it was kind of cold out and I (naturally) wasn't wearing pants, I had my towel that I hadn't used wrapped around myself. Why not ask if he want's to share right?
Wrong. He hesitantly agrees to share my towel with me. I go to get all snuggley close and he just walks away like I'm not even there. Where does he go? Nowhere. He wasn't engaged in any other conversation. There were less than 10 people at that party. I start to maybe think that he already has a lover of some sort and he wasn't allowed to flirt back, but then I remember Taylor talking about him a month ago saying he dumped his girlfriend. Okay, so he's just an ass. No worries, I've dealt with asses before, he'll be doing my every whim by the end of the night. Anyways, so Taylor has everyone go outside because she wanted to start a bonfire. Actually, a man named Dick was going to start said bonfire...with a blow torch.*
*Please note that Dick was NOT part of our friend group
So we're all following Dick to the brush pile. It's pitch black out because it's almost midnight and there was no moon. What a great opportunity to strike up a conversation with Cameron! But every time I went to catch up with him, he walks just a little bit faster. Now I'm thinking, "What the hell. Why do you hate me?" I never did anything to this kid. He should have nothing against me, so what was up his butt?
We all get down to the brush pile and the guys say something about how the fire won't start because all of the wood is wet since it rained for a little bit. Dick can't see what he's doing when all of a sudden Cameron whips out this handy dandy supersonic flashlight with the power of 50,000 demons inside of it. He points it where Dick needs to see and I swear on my life a rooster crowed because it thought the sun was up. After about 10 minutes of failed bonfire and me getting devoured by mosquitoes, Dick runs out of gas in the blow torch (not really surprising because he had it constantly running since he got it out of the garage). Taylor is excusably upset, but leads everyone back up to the house, except no one can see her because it's hella dark out. I'm trying to walk next to Cameron 'cause he has the demon flashlight, right? But he doesn't turn it on. It's like he purposefully leaves it off to make me look like a complete dumbass tripping on everything. In a desperate attempt to save my life, yet still being too proud to ask directly for assistance, I cry out exclaiming that I can't see thinking that maybe he'll get the hint and turn on his demonlight to help the tiny, pathetic me from dying. But no, he responds with the most racist of racist comments at me, keeps walking, and doesn't look back.
I stop in my tracks and I stand there not knowing whether to be heartbroken because the guy I'm pursuing really does hate me or pissed because I had gotten yet another racist comment toward me. Well, since I'm not exactly the most girly of girls, anger trumps all that is involved with my heart. Images of murdering this man flash through my demented mind and it makes me smile on the inside. This comment was pretty much the comment that broke the camel's back. I usually don't say anything back to racist comments because it doesn't accomplish anything, but today I decided to speak up.
Since I'm still nice I decided not to completely yell at this kid I don't know and I say, "Excuse me?! I don't appreciate racist comments!" He says something in response about how he's not racist and how there's black people in his family blah blah blah or something like that. I'm not really sure because I wasn't really listening to anything he was saying because the fact that there's African Americans in his family is of no concern to me. Just because you're friendly to black people does not mean you're not racist. There are Asians in the world, too, and it is very much possible to be racist against them. Anyways, after the party and what-not Cameron realized that I'm pretty much the most fantastic person in the universe and that he would basically die without me. People ask how we met and how long we've been together. I don't really know. Okay, I know how we met because I've just illustrated it for you here, but I don't really know how long we've been together. So I'm just going to say that it was July 4th. It's a good, hearty date that I can remember. I don't even think he knows how long. But yeah, he's not exactly happy that I've made him look like a total ass on this thing, but I don't care. I do what I want. And that is all because I don't really know what else to say...
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